Is it too weird to say that John still talks to me? Well, maybe "talks" is the wrong word. He still communicates to me. He gets his point across and sometimes he even answers questions for me.
When I'm really missing him or needing him I see a sparkle. It says to me "I'm still here and I still love you." Maybe that's just a little thing but it happens often and I find it very comforting.
Then the other day I was driving along and wondering who of two possible handymen that I knew should I hire to do some work on our house. John always did most of the work on our home and I always trusted him in that area. So, I talked to John as I was driving along and I asked him what I should do.
Then, the light turned red and I stopped. There was a car in front of me and I looked at its license plate. You know how some license plates have a metal surround? Some have the name of the driver's alma mater, or maybe a cause they are passionate about. I don't know what the connection was in this particular license plate jacket. All I know is that the first name of one of the two handyman was sitting there on the top of the license plate on the car ahead of me right after I had asked John for advice.
Then there was a recent airplane ride. I have never travelled well. I'm not good on planes. John had always kept me calm. Especially during turbulence. This particular ride had lots of turbulence. I was trying to read on my iPad to distract myself and not having much success. So I closed the iPad for a minute. The turbulence increased and I decided to try my book again. I opened my iPad but instead of my book being opened for me to read, somehow my contacts list had been activated. And whose contact was staring back at me complete with picture? John's! Out of all of the possible entries in that list, why his? It could not have been just chance. No, to me it meant "It's OK. I'm here. I'm with you." Exactly what John would have done.
I love these messages from him.