John is always with me

I spent most of last week in Sedona, a beautiful place that John and I always loved to visit. It helped my soul and I felt very close to John while I was there.
I visited the Chapel of the Holy Cross on Sunday while I was there and shopped in their gift shop. I wanted to buy a remembrance especially on that day because it was our 30th Wedding Anniversary. I was drawn to a special dish and also a card with a little pin called a Memorial Tear on it.
When I brought the dish home, a previous heart I had been drawn to buy fit perfectly on it. Then this morning Chaz tore up some paper in my office and I found him playing with one special little piece. It looked like a heart and so I saved it too. I think it was a gift from John.

I also bought a little Teddy Bear in town after I got back to be  an Anniversary present for John. I wanted to mark the occasion with something and teddy bears were always special to us. The bear sits on my dresser proudly wearing the Memorial Tear I bought.

Our honeymoon

Camping in Rickett's Glen in PA. Such a happy time.

Our Wedding Song

Thank you for needing me, my Love. I will always need you. You made my life complete.

Today is our 30th Wedding Anniversary

Happy Anniversary, Sweetheart. Today I became your wife. So proud and so happy. Today was a day that made us both happy. You were the best husband a woman could have had. You were perfect for me. You brought out the best in me. You always encouraged me. You helped me to become the best me I could be. I hope I made you as happy. I ache for what is no longer and I am incredibly sad that our life has changed this way now. I miss you so much. But I am so happy and so grateful for what we had. I love you, John.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is our 30th Wedding Anniversary. You were always so proud of our marriage. It was so important to both of us. But I know you are here with me. Sending you love, my Sweetheart.

15 Months

Today is the 24th of the month. Another month since John left. 15 months. It still seems like it just happened. I will never get used to this. And I miss John with every cell of my being. What I wouldn't give to be able to hold him once more. At least time past means less time ahead of me until we are together again.

More happy pictures

John - starting nursing school - Fall 1983

Williamsburg 1983

Remodeling the kitchen of our first house 1983