Reframing

I had an insight yesterday during therapy. My therapist helped me get to this point although she claims I did it myself. Actually, I really believe God and John helped me get to this realization because I prayed for them to help me on my way to my session.
Anyway, my problem was dealing with an all-consuming feeling of fear - fear of the unknown, fear of being alone, fear of not being able to handle things by myself. And coupled with that was a feeling of disloyalty toward John is I managed to pull myself out of that slump.
But yesterday for the first time I was able to see that not only am I more capable than I give myself credit for but that John is proud of me for being able to carry on. John was always my biggest fan, my staunchest supporter, my loudest cheerleader.
There is every reason to believe that he is still happy to see me succeed. In fact, I suspect that he may be doing whatever he can to put the right things in my path to help me along. I find that comforting.